Politics, including and especially the election process, is fast becoming a competitive sport.
Quit Yer Bitchin' - The Blog
No Complaining Allowed!
How to Punish Casey Anthony
I was thinking they ought to force Casey Anthony to live with Nadia Suleman in a reality series as her punishment. It seems like a win-win-win to me. Nadia needs all the help she can get, so an extra pair of hands would be welcome. Casey needs practice not accidentally killing young children, and with so many around her she would surely get lots and lots of practice. And the network bold enough to broadcast that hot mess would have the biggest WIN!
What's Up Doc?
Let's talk about doctors and vets for a second. Now, I can actually say
that I'm alive today thanks to doctors fixing me up after a bad car
accident when I was sixteen. I'm forever grateful to them, of course. At
the same time, why didn't the ambulance turn on the siren or lights
when taking me to the hospital? If I died from bleeding to death
internally, which I was...bleeding internally, what would they have
said? "Oops".
The Rapture Is Coming!
The Rapture is supposed to be coming tomorrow, May 21, 2011 and I’m not sure I’m ready. Maybe if it could come next weekend I’d be a little more prepared, but there’s no point in hoping for a rain delay on the End of Times. God has waited so long to close this book, he certainly won’t wait seven more days on my account (especially since his watch seems to run really slow).
Faster Money
Fast Five making $86 million is the greatest news I've heard in a while.
This is just further proof that the majority of people don't give a
shit what they're watching, they just want an escape from reality. Who
wants quality when they watch a movie!? Personally, I would be perfectly
happy watching all the Fastest and Most Furious-est movies on
repeat...maybe once in a while, switch it up and watch Pluto Nash or
Glitter.
The Net Is Watching
The internet knows all my secrets. It’s been tracking everything I’ve
ever said or done while on the net and in the cloud. Some people have a
problem with the internet collecting their search history, their blog
posts and tweets, their purchasing trends, etc. But not me.
I’m okay with it because I’ve been lying about everything this whole time anyway.
I’m okay with it because I’ve been lying about everything this whole time anyway.
Circus Freak Blues
Out of guilt piled on by my big brother (unintentionally, I'm sure!), I
have searched the depths of my soul to find some positivityness to
share. And I've found some. Though I can't promise to be eloquent at
this hour of the morning....
Driver Etiquette 101
I love when people don't let you change lanes and they actually speed up
to block you. As far as being polite goes, that's probably at the tippy
top of things you can do. Also, when I'm on the freeway and somebody is
going 50mph in the fast lane, and I go around them and they speed up so
I can't get over...it's my favorite. I wish everyone would drive around
with no destination in mind and just drive extremely slow and when
people try and pass them, they speed up. It makes total sense to me.
Happy Adam Sandler
I love Adam Sandler but I wish he would stop doing these cookie cutter
comedies. I miss the good ol' days when he did Happy Gilmore, Billy
Madison etc. I even thought Little Nicky was pretty damn
funny....stupid, but funny.
Raising Hope For "Raising Hope"
If you haven't seen the show "Raising Hope", then you're missing out.
It's hilarious! Some of these other shows are getting old, especially
sitcoms. You can tell that they're trying to hard to make people laugh,
because they have the live audience in front of them. I like the shows
that don't have to try and be funny, they just are. Raising Hope is
exactly that and totally reminds me of It's Always Sunny in
Philadelphia, which is the best show on television by the way.
Let's Sensationalize The News A Little More
Broadcast and cable news networks are too tame with their headlines for my taste. When they tease a story with a headline like “Are toxic radiation clouds headed for Southern California?” I don’t feel the proper amount of terror to keep me on that channel to find out the truth (that while, yes, radioactive plumes are headed our way they will be so diluted and dispersed over time that they pose less threat than 20 minutes on the beach without sunscreen).
Grateful For My Cats
I am so grateful that for the past few years, while I’ve been laid up here at home from a back injury, I’ve had the fine company of all my wonderful cats.
Chocoholic Easter
I know that Christmas is the holiday for retailers (and Christians, of course), and Valentine’s Day is a holiday made-up for the benefit of the Greeting Card companies and florists. And St. Patrick’s Day is primarily for the drunks and drinkers alike (and the Irish Catholics). But I am firmly convinced that Easter is a holiday primarily geared towards Chocoholics and largely benefiting the drug-peddling dealers known as the candy companies (and Christians, of course).
Why Angry Birds Belongs On TV
It makes perfect sense to me that they are making an Angry Birds TV show
and (hopefully) movie. I can only speak for myself, but at the end of
my marathon Angry Birds sessions I am often left wanting more depth out
of the story, more insight into the personalities of the birds, more
evil wrongdoings by those nasty little pig heads.
Thank God For Charlie Sheen!
Thank God for Charlie Sheen...at least we don't have to hear about Justin Bieber any more.
Bieber Fever-StrainHV2
I cannot get enough Justin Bieber!! I am thrilled to see him on every
single TV program, in every magazine from Time to TV Guide, on all the
radio programs and podcasts as well. I just think that's what we all
need in this desperate time for our world and our nation; more Justin
Bieber than we can shake a stick at!
Mother Nature Interior Design
Wind is SO cool! The excitement of wondering whether or not I'll be
getting a new patio door courtesy of our homeowner's insurance is
unrivaled! And the idea of finding our patio furniture in our living
room is intriguing. Maybe it'll look so good, we'll just keep it there.
In Praise Of The Super Bowl
I love the Super Bowl! It's awesome to get together with friends,
drinking and laughing, screaming and hollering at the TV! Rewinding the
great moments and analyzing every breathtaking scene as it unfolds on
the screen. The camaraderie of all my friends simultaneously cheering
or moaning depending on how much they've had to drink! Absolutely one
of the funnest parties to go to every year no matter where it's held.
If only they wouldn't keep interrupting the commercials with that stupid football game it would be the perfect television event.
If only they wouldn't keep interrupting the commercials with that stupid football game it would be the perfect television event.
Blister Pack Cure
Really, blister packs for cold medicines are the best invention ever! I
mean, who doesn't look forward to the challenge of getting a pill you
are desperate for out of the packaging? It's a great way to take your
mind off of how crappy you feel!
Gun Control Suggestion
The problem with guns isn't that we need better gun control laws. The
problem is that we need better guns to shoot all the bleeding-heart
liberals that say things like "Guns don't kill people, people kill
people." This one ought to do it!!
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